As I title this post, I realize it should be written as a letter, so here it goes.
Dear Depression and Despair,
It’s really quite sad that I am writing to either one of you. How can you even be in my mind? Why are you both here? Is it because of my diet? My thought life? I suspect both of these.
I think the real reason I’m writing to you both is because of fear. Fear that I won’t lose weight. Fear that my brother will never see TRUTH. Fear that I will never overcome the obstacles in front of me. Fear of MYSELF. Ugh, and then you both come to me and it solidifies the FEAR. I feel HORRIBLE and HOPELESS.
That’s why you are here, isn’t it? To make me feel this way.
So now I am letting you both know, with the mustard seed of faith in the LORD JESUS CHRIST and HIS finished work on the CROSS, that I am not afraid. Well, I am afraid, but God commands me not to be. So in His Word I take my stance.
But WHY? WHY shouldn’t I be afraid. The feelings and circumstances are frightening. And you know that, don’t you. Of course you also probably know that these things that I fear have not happened and may not EVER happen. And yet, you know that I want to hide out under the covers and there you are waiting for me until I am worried and stressed beyond measure. Am I using you or are you using me???
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
I want you to both know that I am going to walk away, no, run away from you and into the arms of my SAVIOR and cling to HIS Promises.
Jesus is FOR me. Jesus DIED for me. Jesus LIVES in me. Jesus LOVES me despite myself!
He get’s it. He understands.
Why would I spend my time with the two of you when I could be spending my time with JESUS?
Depression and Despair, I am leaving you. You have been with me long enough. It is time for me to let go and trust someone other than myself. It is time to stop believing that you will take care of me. It is time to stop being ruled by fear and instead to be ruled by LOVE.
The Long Island Yak